Friday, February 19, 2010

Why Winter Really is Lovely, Really, No Really



Where I live, it has been an especially harsh winter. Lots of snow, lots of gray, spirits are down; spring has never seemed so far away.


Rather than lament winter and its endless possibilities, whaddya say we make a list of all the good things about winter? Oh, c'mon, there are some good things. There are. There have to be. Now stop it.

Let's see:

1. Flattering wardrobe. Sweaters and slacks . . . even the whitest, flabbiest arms and dimpliest thighs can look good in a nice sweater and slacks. Boots will even make the best of thick ankles. Cold weather levels the playing field.

2. Static cling. Oh yes. It creates the most dynamic and creative hairstyles and provides endless teaching opportunities . . . if you're looking for lessons on electric static, and really, who isn't?

3. Quiet time.  All the time spent inside actually saves time. No obligatory small-talk conversations with neighbors you really have no interest in. Oh, you do too have one . . . or two.

4. No grass to cut. Be fair. That's a huge time-saver.  I don't care how much shoveling you've done this winter, you're still ahead of the game. 

5. Snowmen. The most polite and well-mannered and clean men around. And they know their place.  (C'mon "inside guys," you know you wanna laugh.)

6. Money.  With all the glove-wearing, you really don't need that manicure. Now you have extra money for salt for your driveway and walkways. Win-win.  See?

7. Endless freezer space.  Should your power go out -- as mine did during the last blizzard, that's right, it failed us when we needed it most and threatened the lives of my pets and the welfare of my children . . . but I'm over it now, almost, well almost, someday.  Anyway, the food in the 'fridge and freezer will not spoil, just hike it right outside where it will stay frozen. solid. indefinitely.

8. Socially Accepted Slovenliness.  You have perfect excuse for a filthy car. No peer pressure driving you to the car wash. Shew! Now that's a relief. Just don't lean on the thing or, gawd forbid, brush up against it as you're squeezing by it on the little space left on your driveway that is passable for all the waist-high snow. No, as long as you don't do that, your coat won't get ruined and your hands won't be black with road yuck. See? Simple.

9. Potholes. The sudden creation of crater-like potholes that threaten the entire health and happiness and, possibly, the mere existence of your vehicle makes driving so much more exhilarating. Who needs a Wii?

10. . .

Well, I'd like to have ten, a nice even number that subconsciously suggests abundance . . .

Let me think . . .

wait . . .

hmmmm . . .

hmph.

Well, I could list a tenth, if I wanted, but instead -- and on purpose, you smart-allecks -- I'm going to leave the tenth one blank to demonstrate that the list could just go on and on indefinitely. So there.


Feel free to add to my list, in an orderly and respectful fashion . . . no pushing or shoving, there will be enough time for all.






16 comments:

KeLLy aNN said...

10th ~ Snow Soup.

Chickens in the Basement said...

Hmmm...Huge pots of chili on the stove? Time to finish all those projects you started through the year? Backing up to the fireplace until your pants are so hot, you're sure flames are imminent? Watching and returning all of the Netflix videoes that have been on the counter for a month? Not having to wash the dog? Time to roll the coins in that huge jar in the closet?

I think most of these are chores, not so much the BEAUTY of winter!

Get me out of this house!!!
Anna

Beansieleigh said...

How about the stylish footwear I get to sport around in from day to day! Yup.. Who needs pretty high heels, or a pretty pair of sandals, when you get to trudge through the snow all winter in the yuck-n-muck slush-n-snowy mess in your favorite pair of weather beaten work boots?!!.. Oh you're not looking for sarcasm?.. Fine, well then, I do like baking in the winter! In the winter it certainly is cool enough to run my oven as often and as long as I want! I LOVE making cakes and cookies of all kinds!! ~tina

LemonyRenee' said...

That's right thinking, Beans! Who needs to toddle around on "pretty" shoes. Naw, I'll take flat-bottomed, rubber-soled shoes any day. My podiatrist would be so happy!

Jenny said...

It's been a long time since I've lived in snow but I forgot the static cling issue. Yikes! Cute post.

silk purse said...

If "diamonds are a girls best friend", then with the downturn in the economy, it seems, for all but a privileged few, then "snow diamonds", as I so lovingly refer to them, must be the 2010 version of "a girls best friend"! .., At least those ones are beautiful, oh so sparkly, come in abundance and are free!..,

I laughed out loud with a few of those, giggled and grinned bemusedly with all!

You have a serious way with words!.., Hilarious!.., (Though I must confess at times, I even wondered whether most of us "poor sods", should laugh or cry")!?..,

Well, as I always say,"really"!..,"Better to laugh than cry"!!..,

It's just so easy with your 'Lemons and Honey', "lemony" rapier whit with just the right touch of "honey"!!..,

Do "click on over" and visit my little corner of the blogging world; where at least on my blog banner, there are 'honey bees galore'! At least with reference to 'honey', you'll feel right at home!..,

Cheers from Wanda Lee @ The Plumed Pen

Debra@Common Ground said...

Great List, and I wholeheartedly agree. Jeans, sweater, boots, and woolly scarf, yep I'm ready to go. I haven't washed my poor little car since fall. I am so ready for spring! So I'm daydreaming!
Great to meet You!
big hugs,
Debra

Chicken Boys said...

I still have a pot of snow cream in the freezer....ate some yesterday while my sick @$$ lounged on the couch! I hate winter colds! I hate cold weather! Our snow is gone from here and needs to stay away! And don't get me started on static. I can't open a stinkin' (not the word I wanna use) door with out getting the shock of a life time! I dread stopping for gas cause I know I'll get electricuted just by paying for it! I swear, one of these days I'm moving to Aruba! Try and stop me! I dare ya!
~Randy

P.S. Saw a comment elsewhere about your daughter. Hope all goes well for you.

Together We Save said...

Oh my... that is alot of snow!

Rosie@Journey to Charm said...

How about not having to drag the hose all over the yard in 100 degree drought? That's my favorite part of winter! Thanks for your sweet comment on my post. Rosie

Patti said...

Snow days - no school!

June said...

Rene, this is so funny! I loved the manicure one. Let's see...something good about the snow and cold that we call Winter...Yes, I'm stalling...sorry, I think you covered them all.
hugs

bad penny said...

oh bless you ! I would go mad I'm sure - one week off school & I was a screaming banshee to the teens the other day ! Just in time for them going back & I can GET ON...I do my back in ...

I HATE that static thing which always leads to an electric shock on th supermarket trolley and makes me look such an idiot shouting " ouch " loudly in the veggie isle.

Also I hate wearing thick clothes........

Widge said...

no waxing

Anonymous said...

This is probably the most amazing blogs Ive go through in a quite prolonged time. The amount of info in here is amazing, like you practically wrote the book around the subject matter. Your weblog is great for any individual who desires to comprehend this subject much more. Great things; please maintain it up!

Anonymous said...

Wonderful blog! I verily love how it' s untroubled on my eyes as expertly as the evidence are superbly written. I am wondering how I can be notified whenever a restored brief has been made. I obtain subscribed to your rss devour which call for to do the trick! Procure a nice day!
[IMG]http://www.sedonarapidweightloss.com/weightloss-diet/34/b/happy.gif[/IMG]

Related Posts with Thumbnails